My brother Frank is on the plane to Alaska and will arrive tonight. I can hardly believe it! The day has finally come. My heart is crying, resonating with joy and painful loss, my emotions howling at the return of a pack member. I can hardly believe that after his long 2.5 year journey through physical death, mental madness and institutional life he is delivering his Self whole on my doorstep this night! A new journey begins for him, my family and for us together. The timing seems perfect. With my broken wrist I can be more present, since I am not able to work. He can help so much having two hands.
Lately, I have been enjoying discovering family members through the animal medicine they carry. Frank has Eagle, Wolf and Turkey medicine. I was guided to do a couple balances for Frank, the Divine Plan, the spirits of the land, family & home here, & ascension. I love knowing the spirits are on board! Thank you most amazing supportive spirits!
Thank you all in my spiritual circle for your support through these last couple years. It has made all the difference that I may walk this consciously. Many thanks in particular to Kathryn for the guidance and teaching on this walk. It allowed me to be alive in my life through this time period, to find joy in a bigger plan and to assist others. It has been the difference between an attitude of death and dispair or an outlook of life and connection
I am grateful for the glorious double-brilliant March sunlight reflecting off generous sparkling snowdrifts here to welcome Frank to Alaska and into life again. Please welcome this new member. Gratitude in advance to my amazing and vibrant spiritual community members. Thank you!
SkyWalker Sings with her Heart
Wednesday, March 17
A Gift from a Wolf-dog
When I was about 19 or 20, I became the happy care-taker of a beautiful silver-gray puppy whose mother was half wolf. Kobuk was his name, and he grew into an amazingly wolf-like being. He was so intelligent that I could show him something one time, and he would learn it instantly. I never even appreciated this ability until many years later when I had the opportunity to work with normal dogs, and learn the methods of training (especially repetition).
Over the years that he lived with my family, I was spending a lot of time with horses. At first I believed that I was training horses. As I became more perceptive, I saw that I was really learning from horses about life, healing, and ascension. The horses taught me more about energy flow than any meditation class or martial art. Much of my time was spent riding horses across country, on trails or just going from landmark to landmark with a contour map.
Kobuk assumed a special role of protector on these journeys. Many times I was riding a young horse who did not have a lot of confidence. Horses are herd animals, and do not really like to be away from their herd. Every time I would go out on a young horse, Kobuk would trot ahead, disappearing from view.
The moment the horse would encounter something that frightened it, such as a stream crossing for the first time, or a scary white rock (it could be anything), Kobuk would appear just ahead and stand waiting, giving the horse confidence that it was not alone. If the horse did not make it past the obstacle, he would walk right up to it, as if having a conversation! Then he would lead the horse across or through the challenge, and would once again disappear ahead.
Kobuk accompanied me through many years of growth and change and life. He became a playmate/babysitter for my daughter when she was born. He alerted me whenever someone unknown to him came on our land. He was my dear friend and companion.
Eventually the time came when Kobuk was ready to cross. Because I did not yet know how to communicate directly with an animal's spirit, I had a lot of conflict over this event. He was very old (15), and had lived a happy and fulfilled life. He was mostly deaf and could not see very well, and seemed to be in his own little world most of the time. And my husband and I had made the decision to leave the area, and would not have a permanent home for some time to come. We could not imagine taking him out of his element and asking him to try and make an adjustment to this new life in his current condition.
The day came when Kobuk was scheduled to die. Our veterinarian friend came to our home and I held Kobuk in my arms while he received the shot that would initiate the death process. An amazing thing happened in that moment. Because I had not communicated anything to him, as he received the shot, he went into a panic of realization, and began to struggle. That moment of struggle sent me into a huge process of sadness, betrayal, and believing that I had killed my best friend.
The worst part was that I could not let go of this self guilt. No matter how I tried to forgiver myself, I could not. It turned into a kind of despair that descended into my physical body and I could not even talk about his death for almost two years.
Around two years later, I was waking up very early in the morning. It was amoment of dreaming in that lucid state before you are truly awake, and I had the most amazing dream. I was in total darkness alone. I heard someone call my name, but could not tell where it was in location to me or which direction the sound was coming from. Then it happened again but this time it was closer, louder. I felt as if someone was on the other side of a glass window, trying to get my attention.
Then suddenly, inthe darkness, I felt Kobuk's tongue licking my hands. I felt him wagging his tail and bumping happily against my legs...His energy was high and he was showing me, "LOOK! I am alive! I am here! I forgive you!"
He had the wild happiness of a 3 month old puppy.
After that experience, I was completely able to forgive myself. Because I now knew beyond any shadow of doubt that death was not real, that somewhere Kobuk was still experiencing life in a body, happy and healthy, and that he had given me this gift so I could move forward and get on with living.
He changed my understanding of death forever. Thank you Kobuk!
Kachina
Over the years that he lived with my family, I was spending a lot of time with horses. At first I believed that I was training horses. As I became more perceptive, I saw that I was really learning from horses about life, healing, and ascension. The horses taught me more about energy flow than any meditation class or martial art. Much of my time was spent riding horses across country, on trails or just going from landmark to landmark with a contour map.
Kobuk assumed a special role of protector on these journeys. Many times I was riding a young horse who did not have a lot of confidence. Horses are herd animals, and do not really like to be away from their herd. Every time I would go out on a young horse, Kobuk would trot ahead, disappearing from view.
The moment the horse would encounter something that frightened it, such as a stream crossing for the first time, or a scary white rock (it could be anything), Kobuk would appear just ahead and stand waiting, giving the horse confidence that it was not alone. If the horse did not make it past the obstacle, he would walk right up to it, as if having a conversation! Then he would lead the horse across or through the challenge, and would once again disappear ahead.
Kobuk accompanied me through many years of growth and change and life. He became a playmate/babysitter for my daughter when she was born. He alerted me whenever someone unknown to him came on our land. He was my dear friend and companion.
Eventually the time came when Kobuk was ready to cross. Because I did not yet know how to communicate directly with an animal's spirit, I had a lot of conflict over this event. He was very old (15), and had lived a happy and fulfilled life. He was mostly deaf and could not see very well, and seemed to be in his own little world most of the time. And my husband and I had made the decision to leave the area, and would not have a permanent home for some time to come. We could not imagine taking him out of his element and asking him to try and make an adjustment to this new life in his current condition.
The day came when Kobuk was scheduled to die. Our veterinarian friend came to our home and I held Kobuk in my arms while he received the shot that would initiate the death process. An amazing thing happened in that moment. Because I had not communicated anything to him, as he received the shot, he went into a panic of realization, and began to struggle. That moment of struggle sent me into a huge process of sadness, betrayal, and believing that I had killed my best friend.
The worst part was that I could not let go of this self guilt. No matter how I tried to forgiver myself, I could not. It turned into a kind of despair that descended into my physical body and I could not even talk about his death for almost two years.
Around two years later, I was waking up very early in the morning. It was amoment of dreaming in that lucid state before you are truly awake, and I had the most amazing dream. I was in total darkness alone. I heard someone call my name, but could not tell where it was in location to me or which direction the sound was coming from. Then it happened again but this time it was closer, louder. I felt as if someone was on the other side of a glass window, trying to get my attention.
Then suddenly, inthe darkness, I felt Kobuk's tongue licking my hands. I felt him wagging his tail and bumping happily against my legs...His energy was high and he was showing me, "LOOK! I am alive! I am here! I forgive you!"
He had the wild happiness of a 3 month old puppy.
After that experience, I was completely able to forgive myself. Because I now knew beyond any shadow of doubt that death was not real, that somewhere Kobuk was still experiencing life in a body, happy and healthy, and that he had given me this gift so I could move forward and get on with living.
He changed my understanding of death forever. Thank you Kobuk!
Kachina
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